did someone say "Miss Herman"?

For those of you who haven't heard, God blind-sided me with an amazing blessing (I think!) last week. As many of you know, I have been waiting, sometimes patiently, sometimes not so much, seeking His direction for me. Several practical and appealing opportunities have presented themselves, but although logical, I had a peace about none of them...and so I waited...and waited. Most of you know that waiting is not one of my strengths. I like to move, I like to go, I like to do.

A good friend reminded me of the story of Jacob wrestling with God. He refused to give up, he refused to move on. She pointed out that God knew it took obedience and restraint for me to wait, and so He blessed me with a "suddenly". There were several paths I could have taken (many have said I 'should' have taken them), but I refused to be in any place He did not take me to. So I waited...wanting so bad to do, but not knowing what to do.

So I'm at work Wednesday. While trying to answer students' questions in the lobby of Admissions, I'm approached by a gentleman whom I knew to be an ESL instructor at RCC. "Are you Jenelle?" "Ya. Why?" "Oh, good, I've been looking all over for you." "Why? What do you want?" (Note: I'm in high-speed mode. The lobby is quite crowded with antsy and confused students and I'm anxious to help them out and clear them out.) "You have your MA in TESOL from APU?" "Ya." "We've had a higher demand for ESL classes than we expected and we need another teacher. Would you be interested?" "Uh, ya." "That's great!" "So what do we need to do?" "That's a good question. Let me go find out!" "Uh, ok. Do you want my number?" "Ya, tha'd be great!"

Stunned. Shocked. Overwhelmed. Amazed. I'm not sure which most accurately describes the emotions I felt. However, shocked is not an emotion I experience often...yet it remained all day without ceasing.

Within minutes, I received a phone call asking me to come interview with a couple of the ESL teachers, with the assumption that things would go well, I would observe a class that night, and start teaching Reading the next week. Mind you I'm dressed in my typical attire, but on the more casual end of that! They said that wasn't a problem. So off to the interview I went.

I quickly realized that my handle on TESOL concepts and terminology were no longer at the tip of my tongue. Usually, performing in such circumstances is one of my gifts. That was not so this time. We did enjoy ourselves though.

Shortly after the interview, I received a call telling me it was a go...except I'd be teaching the Grammar and Writing class...and I would begin on Friday! Either they were absolutely desperate or they somehow overlooked all my shortcomings in the interview and somehow saw some potential in me. Nevertheless, it was mine! Not by any means because I'd earned it, but purely because God had given it to me.

The shock increased when I realized I'd be teaching in less than 48-hours and had no idea what I'd be teaching, nor did I even know which textbooks we'd be using! There's nothing like a little pressure and uncertainty when you start something new! I went home completely thrilled...and terrified as I realized I had no idea what I needed to do to prepare and I would be in a classroom in front of students very soon.

A phone call that night from one of the teachers, an encounter with him the next morning, and a meeting that afternoon set my fears at ease and the excitement began to win out. Thursday night as I prepared and Friday as I entered my classroom I was still at ease. I expected to be nervous, but it felt right...righter (pardon the gramar) that I ever thought possible. Perhaps God is beginning to answer His promise to me that He would develop in me a love for teaching. Time will tell.

My students were precious. Respectful and quiet, yet responsive and willing to participate. They range in age from probably 18 or 20 to a cute 62-year old woman. They seem hungry to learn, and even appeared hopeful that they could one day love writing as I have grown to.

I still feel overwhelmed and am certainly a little lost as to how to do the best job for these students. But I am definitely excited and anxious to watch them grow. I think I could see a lot of positive results in my own strengths, but I can only make a true difference if I rely on His. I pray He will continue to teach me how. I pray for people around me who will model that for me, and at the same time, challenge and encourage me to do the same. I pray that His gift to me will be for His glory.

P.S. I told them they have to call me "Jenelle". I was never one for formalities! I can handle "Miss Jenelle", but "Miss Herman"? ...just couldn't do it!